Getting Prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse.

I'm always reminding the humans of this world to prepare themselves for the inevitable Zombie Apocalypse, the set-date has yet to be confirmed. (trying to get a group of Zombies to agree on anything can take generations)

So there is no better advice to give then to make sure all necessary preparations have been made.  I recommend reading "The Zombie Survival Guide" by Max Brooks to get you started.  However, finding information on farming can be found in other forms of literature.

Recently, I came across the website www.inCaseofZombies.com where a small team in Tuscon, AZ have createdEmergency Kits, or "Zombie Defense Boxes", to be used  in case of the Zombie Apocalypse.

Sample product at InCaseofZombies.com

This little beauty looked like a sweet deal, going at $69.99 for this dual pistol set, but then I saw the orange tips of the guns and came to find out they were replicas.  I was really hoping they were real.  Don't worry, while the guns may be fake, the machetes and hunting knives are completely real.  Like this set:

While the $139.99 dollar price tag didn't sit too well for me, I still believe that these sets are going for a decent price.  Simply replace the toy guns with your own real weapons and you're set and ready to go.

While the weapons appear perfectly suitable for fighting off a bunch of UnDead Cannibalistic Monsters, some of the Emergency Health Packsconsisted of mostly sugary treats and energy drinks.  I do thinks humans may need a bit more than that.

While InCaseofZombies.com gives some great suggestions and puts your head in the right place, I leave it up to you to get your own provisions ready and let you make the decision of what you need for when the world goes to shit.  Just remember, as Tallahassee told us, "Twinkies do have an expiration date."

Which reminds me, send whatever help you can to make sure Tallahassee actor Woody Harrelson returns for "Zombieland 2". 

-HSZ

Kevin Smith uses Zombie Virus for Weight Loss

Zombies in Hollywood are nothing new.  We all know how much these attention-craving stars will do anything to keep their young looks about them.  Plastic surgery may appear to be the answer, but just take a look at some of the folks that have chosen to go under the knife:



Not a pretty picture in the long haul, so it would come as no surprise that celebrities are using any method they can get their hands on to keep their young sex appeal.  Some speculate that some of these famous folks have done everything from wacky diets to signing deals with the Devil.

I, however, know of a more realistic form that many of these Stars are diving into and that is a concentrated strain of the Zombie Virus.

The latest victim in this "Keep me Young" horde was the notable film directorKevin Smith.
It's no secret that Hollywood has been using strains of the Zombie Virus for some time.  Only the Hollywood elite were allowed to  partake in this, such asLarry King and his wife, as seen below:



You can't look at them and tell me with a straight face that they are not zombies.

Kevin Smith currently came on the radar after he was refused to board a Southwest flight because he was "too fat to fly."  This brought an uproar from the "Clerks" director and sent him into a depressive state that would kill any rational human being.

Recently, Smith reported that he had lost 65lbs in an effort to become more healthy.  What Smith didn't report was that his weight loss was mainly contributed to the Zombie Virus.

Taking regular injections with controlled medication, Marijuana, Smith has been able to pull off the farce that he lost the weight due a "healthier lifestyle".  We all know that once a Chunk, always a Chunk and old habits don't die that quickly.

Kevin Smith's Zombie-state will only increase and grow worse, being unable to do any public appearances and preventing him from directing any more films.

Had we all wished that Smith would have lost weight the correct way with proper diet and exercise, Hollywood doesn't wait and neither could he.

When the Zombie Apocalypse comes Smith will definitely do what he does best, pig out on the entrails of Ben Affleck.


-HSZ